they'll be coming for us soon, those wildest dreams stuck to the moon

I know I am back on here a week later exactly, instead of doing homework. I can't stop thinking about this one subject on my mind, so I had to come on here to share my thoughts.

Mentoring | to support and encourage people to manage their own learning in order that they may maximize their potential, develop their skills, improve their performance and become the person they want to be. 

{A way to help a mentee in their career, direction, solutions as well as believing in their self along with boosting confidence.source

I feel as though I have never had this aspect in my life really ever. Maybe, that is how it is for majority of people. I honestly do not know, but it was on my mind all morning and I wish I had somebody that was a mentor for me. I say this, because I feel like I have so many things in and or on my mind, but no one to go to for direction in a sense. Yes, I have a lot of people in life to talk about things or to get confident boosters sure. And perhaps, it is also on my part to find a mentor or seek one out? I feel it would help me out a lot and everything that is inside of my head would be able to be challenged or freely released with a helpful hand. I feel stuck a lot of the time, probably most of the time in my head which this quotation explains it best "You know what truly aches all that you are? Having so much inside of you and not having the slightest clue of how to pour it out" - Christopher Poindexter <--- The following sums up pretty good how I feel inside. I feel I have so many ideas that I do say freely to people and they use it and I don't necessarily care in a sense.

The part that kind of is challenging is always having cool ideas and people liking them while doing really incredible things with them and then being the person standing next to the person.

"O: you can't intimidate that, 
P: I couldn't 
O: and make it any better
P: i was always going to come in second"

I feel this quotation from Pharrell Williams and Oprah's Next Chapter talks to me in the sense of having the feeling of coming in second. I do feel that a lot, all the time actually, it's hard and also a struggle in a way. A struggle to find out what is the greatest element within my passion of who I am and not that of others in what they are doing. I get I will never be at the forefront like others that I see and I am okay with that, nor am I one to be center front of attention. I always try to stay humble in this huge universal puzzle piece. The hard part is figuring out all the pieces and understanding everything in my head and how will I ever make it all come to fruition, that part is super hard for me. Also having those people who realize the propensities within me; I feel I've never been surrounded around people in this nature. It's kind of super hard, because I see everybody have those same propensities and do it better. I know they are good and am amazing along with see those people who realize their propensities and encourage them. I struggle with having someone be encouraging with ideas or things of myself that seeps out of my soul.

Also seeing peers doing incredible things and being super amazing at the exact same thing you're both learning and studying. Even in other areas, that does not have to do within the form of my peers in everyday life, but also expanding into the desires of others who are fulfilling the dreams that i really would like to achieve. I struggle to attain how it's going to come about. I feel everybody else can do the exact same thing as i can. If you go beyond everything of yourself and follow what Pharrell states allowing yourself to be unafraid to dream and more brave to gallant to blueprint what you envision.

"they were like my peers and i wanted to be like them and i misinterpreting what they were doing. the only thing i was paying attention to was the pixie dust in the magic trick and not the purpose. it was the aesthetic and not the vertebrae of what he was doing." - Pharrell Williams

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Sometimes I feel like I can't run and I can't crawl or I feel I'm nothing at all with so many things stuck in my head and sometimes life is a lesson and you have to start to recognize the signs.

{this post is kind of all over everywhere and probably doesn't even make sense, but I wanted to share my inner being thoughts}


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